crack like the pavement

the tears,

they are random 

because i feel okay 

almost all of the time 

then i crack like the pavement 

i melt for a moment 

i stare at the simple, open sky 

and i dream of a place

where the wind never dies 

& tears aren’t so funny 

and rivers are wine 

because i try to find 

a hand to hold mine 

but nobody wants me

no one is mine

i run until i can’t 

i run until my nose bleeds

i run until the pain 

is in my muscles and joints 

and not my head and heart

i grip the steering wheel 

i punch the dash 

i peer through the camera 

and it makes me gasp 

because all of this, 

whether or not it comes into focus 

is so beautiful 

it takes my breath away